Dark Times Persist in the Modern Day

We watched the movie The Hours last week which really brought Mrs. Dalloway into a different light. While parts of the novel were quite dark, especially with regards to Septimus and when Mrs. Dalloway contemplated death, the overall tone of the book had a light quality to it.  The movie adaptation of it was essentially entirely dark.  Whether literally dark because all the shades in Richard's apartment were pulled down, or metaphorically when Clarissa has a break down, or even musically with the manipulating-ly repetitive music when Laura was baking a cake or driving, the movie as a whole was very dark.  This had an effect of drawing out what Virginia Woolf must have been feeling herself, as well as reiterating how fleeting and short life can be.

The movie also affected me quite a bit more than I had expected it to.  In general, I am an emotional person, so the fact that I was quite upset at the scene where Virginia Woolf drowns herself in the river while her suicide note is being recited wasn't surprising.  I was dripping tears when Laura was contemplating suicide and leaving her boy, and even more so in the heart-wrenching scene where Richard and Clarissa interact almost unknowingly one last time before he falls out the window.  I think that these scenes affected me more than they would normally because in a three-week span, with the movie sandwiched in between, two people I knew committed suicide themselves, and the realization that terrible things like this happen to people you don't necessarily expect them to, really hit home.

All of the deaths in the movie The Hours, the death of Septimus in Mrs. Dalloway, as well as the death of Virginia Woolf in real life, really had an impact on me, for I was in a dark mood myself the last few weeks.  All of those people, real or not, had a story behind them, one that was not necessarily visible to everyone else, and all, whether they knew it or not, impacted someone else with their life, as well as their death.

Digressing a bit from English Class, I would like to say I am so sorry for Cl. and Co. who, in their better days, brought a lot of light to the world.  I can't believe they're gone.  RIP.

Ramblings on Septimus and Language Barriers

While I already have the majority of my response paper written, and most of the ideas jotted down, I have a large compilation of notes on Septimus and psychology in general that might not end up in it.

Perceptions of Reality
-We know that Septimus is not insane in the sense that insanity is being incoherent and rambling randomly with no purpose, once we are taken inside his mind, though what comes out of his mouth might appear so.
-The fragments that he speaks aloud or has Lucrezia write down are enough to concern the people listening, but his thoughts are quite coherent.
-Whatever goes on inside Septimus' mind is the representation of his reality: he believes Evans to be walking towards him, if only just for a moment before returning to "absolute" reality.
-The shock of the war and the death of his closest friend are what seem to be the main triggers for his madness/state of mind.
-The distinctions between reality and hallucinations aren't apparent to him at the time they occur, but when he is in a relatively clear state of mind, such as when he is sitting with Lucrezia making hats, he is aware that he is the only one around him that thinks and sees and hears the things he does.
-For all we know, the things Septimus describes in his mind are actually happening, and that Lucrezia is not openly aware of them, and therefore cannot pay enough detail to notice that birds are actually singing in Greek.
-Septimus sees the truth in his perceptions and his brain is sending him subliminal messages.  Because he has not fully dealt with the death of Evans, manifestations of his friend appear subconsciously to allow him to remember the pain and consciously deal with the pain of the years past.
-Septimus' poetic and artistic side from before the war come out even more radically and make him exaggerate the things he sees, and he can't separate reality from these exaggerations.

Clarissa might reflect on an event as terrible while Peter remembers it as one of the greatest things he has ever experienced.


Everyone's perceptions of reality are distorted by emotions, memories, and their character -- not just in the novel, but in real life too.  A color that looks dull and boring to one person might be seen as the most intricate of colors to another.  Take the color turquoise for example.  I might be speaking of my favorite color turquoise while someone else is thinking of the color turquoise.  There is a gap between descriptions of colors.  How do I know the color blue to me is not the color blue to someone else, and that when someone points to something and labels it blue, that becomes my shared definition of that color as well?

Anyways, as Clarissa thinks of something exciting that Peter thinks is boring, Septimus has an exciting reality that other people just cannot see.  Whether or not he his hallucinating, or seeing supernatural things, or making things up -- it doesn't matter, because to him, it's real and that is what shapes him and his decisions and ramblings, what HE perceives his HIS reality, whether or not anyone else agrees with it.

When You've Got Nothing Left, You've Got Nothing Left To Lose

The last couple days of class have been focused on Septimus and his life story, and many enthralling discussions have been prevalent.  Whenever Septimus Smith is a topic of discussion, I fill entire pages up taking notes during class time and still don't manage to get every idea I'm having/everything I hear down.  The ambiguity of the character and things hinted at in the book are what leave so much potential for different opinions and outputs, and lead to never-ending discussions.
 
What goes on inside Septimus' head, and the way Virginia Woolf manages to believably portray those thoughts, is fascinating to me.  Septimus' thought-process and thoughts and actions are just radical enough to seem odd for the "average" person (which we now know he is not), yet still perfectly believable of a human mind when demented or gifted (depending on what point of view you take).  Before the war, Septimus was an aspiring poet, self-educated, open-spirited, and determined young man.  He seems to have maintained these qualities for at least part of the war, until the end when his friend Evans is killed.  I think that was the catalyst along with Septimus' denial of his closest friend's death, that ultimately led to his pronounced "madness."

While I greatly sympathize with Lucrezia and all the troubles she has been going through with a husband who seems incapable of returning affection or maintaing a typical conversation, I also feel bad for Septimus who is estranged from the rest of the world and trapped inside a brain that shows him things others can't see -- and if he drifts away into his thoughts or comments on them, others (primarily Lucrezia) are constantly trying to snap him out of it, or are perplexed by the oddities that come out of his mouth and seek help for him.

When we are given full insight from Septimus' point of view, we see that he is not insane, and that he is quite capable of making judgements and rationalizing.  At one point when Septimus is acting more "like his old self," we see him pondering over "why seek truths and deliver messages (139)" when everyone else is doing simple, normal things.  We see that he is aware that he has odd thoughts though he can't really control him, and the fact that he is helplessly aware that something is different about him makes him even more sympathetic.

I was really upset when Septimus jumped out the window, especially because "He did not want to die (146)" and he only jumped out because the stupid doctor was imposing himself on Septimus and Lucrezia's lives.  However if Septimus had felt that he still had something powerful enough to live for (not much earlier he was debating over the point of delivering important messages, so that sense of urgency seemed to have diminished) he probably wouldn't have been so desperate to rid himself of the doctor, by whatever means possible.  For this reason, I feel that he didn't really have much left to live for, besides the hot sun (since he dislikes humans and their meddling).  Right after his incident, we switch to Lucrezia's mind who's thoughts take on ideas and patterns very similar to those of Septimus.  Though I don't think she realizes it, her husband's death led Lucrezia to a similar insanity/state of mind that her husband had: imagining running through cornfields, hearing whispers, and envisioning the sea.  She keeps repeating "He is dead" and wondering if they will bring his body to her, but she feels no pain, no emotion, and this is exactly what happened to Septimus when Evans died.

I feel a little flustered with how Woolf killed off my favorite character, but I suppose it makes sense for his death to not be too dramatic, especially since it allows for us to see into Lucrezia's mind who wasn't expecting anything, making the shock more dramatic.  I wonder how the rest of the book will be without Septimus, perhaps a little dull?